When I heard that Jerry Falwell had died back in 2007, I remember being sad. While Falwell had dedicated his life to making the lives of myself and my LGBT brothers and sisters a living hell, I knew that he had friends, a wife, children and grandchildren who were mourning his passing.
If there is any way to actually live out the horrid theology of “love the sinner, hate the sin,” this has to be it. I abhorred everything Falwell did. I found his behavior to be sinful against other human beings—as he dedicated his life to ensuring at least one segment of society would live in the clutches of condemnation.
That did not excuse me, however, from loving him as a fellow human being and wishing him well. I deeply disagree with Rick Santorum, Newt Gingrich, and Mitt Romney, but I wish none of them ill and I do hope that their own true happiness will lead them to realize the humanity of those they so often vilify with such relish.
A girl can dream.
The hypocrisy of the “love the sinner, hate the sin” theology that the religious right insists it lives out in its battle to quash equal rights for LGBT people continues to rear its hideous head in this ongoing presidential race.
The three frontrunners (as such) continue to bash gays to build their conservative cred and further divide and conquer voters.
What galls me the most right now, however, is a Focus on the Family article over at Citizen Link touting the benefits of marriage and how it encourages monogamy. The article said there are four major benefits to monogamy, including reducing crime because married men “are 35% less likely to commit crimes, and 50% less likely to commit violent crimes.” Monogamy can also lead to gender equality (which is kind of odd for a conservative Christian web site to promote), reduce household conflict and improve the well-being of children “through greater paternal investment.”
Reading through the study, it hit me: I think one of the main reasons the religious right wants to deny gays and lesbians marriage equality is because marriage is actually good for couples. Imagine it, if full marriage rights are granted, then gay and lesbian people would be happier and healthier—and what would that do to the propaganda Focus and other groups use to convince the world that LGBT people are living desperately unhappy lives?
If the religious right truly “loved the sinner” then they’d want those “sinners” to be as happy as they can be; as healthy as they can be. But, happy and healthy gay and lesbian couples puts the lie to what the religious right has always taught about the degenerate “lifestyles” LGBT people insist on living.
Granting marriage rights would also acknowledge another thing the religious right doesn’t want to recognize: the true humanity of LGBT people. To them, our homosexuality (or bisexuality or transgenderism) is simply a symptom of sin—something we can change, like underwear. We’re not really gay or lesbian, we’re like Ted Haggard: “a heterosexual with issues.” If they can keep up this façade, then they can continue to foster self-hatred in LGBT people, their families and their friends. They can also keep using this wedge issue to raise money to fight against any movement to recognize gays and lesbians as real people with a real sexual orientation and not just “issues” in need of a “cure.”
The religious right’s fervor over the issue continues to grow more strident as polls show an increase in support for civil unions, if not full marriage equality, for gays and lesbians. That climb can be attributed to the younger generation’s general ease with LGBT people, but I think it’s also because people, in general, are starting to accept LGBT people as fellow human beings.
As Mahan Siler, one of the early founders of the Alliance of Baptists writes:
Same-sex couples in their covenants declare the same hope that I have with my wife. They too make promises to love and cherish until parted by death. They are for marriage, not against it. They help us all hold high the bar of covenant love.
That’s the danger the religious right fears most, that people will finally understand that gay and lesbian people want to enter marriage because they revere it, not because they want to “redefine” it. Gays and lesbians want marriage because of more than government benefits, but the health benefits for themselves and their children. The religious right will continue to fight marriage equality tooth and nail. They cannot recognize LGBT people as full human beings because to do so means they lose the cultural war. If they can keep LGBT people in misery as second class citizens, then our community continues to fulfill their prophecy that we live in misery.
Denying marriage rights (and the benefit of happiness it can bring) is part and parcel to the religious right’s war on LGBT people. They must keep this entire class of people from engaging in anything that might make the whole community happier and healthier—their very jobs depend on it.
